


Aqua pools and Blood drops

by VioletrReader



Category: Red vs. Blue
Genre: Blue team togetherness, Fluff, Genderbent Tucker, Junior family time
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-01
Updated: 2020-01-01
Packaged: 2021-02-27 08:47:18
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,559
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22064248
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/VioletrReader/pseuds/VioletrReader
Summary: “Blargh!”Fuck him, It’s right in the door.And It’s making that face again, like he just ate a lemon whole.“Kid. This is my base, get out of my way.”Junior points a single talon up straight at his face,“Honk!”“Hold still I’m shooting you.”
Relationships: Junior & Tucker, Junior&Church
Comments: 13
Kudos: 33





	Aqua pools and Blood drops

**Author's Note:**

> I’m here!!!!
> 
> I intended to have this for you guys for Christmas but I really underestimated my Christmas plans. The next chapter of ADFTSH will hopefully be done by the end of the month. I’ve had less time for my writing because I’m getting ready to run my first ever 5k.
> 
> Thank you guys, for still wanting to read my writing even if I’m not posting as often as I’d like. You guys are the best :)

“You’re fucking _showering_ with that thing?”

Tucker’s little mistake splashes against Blue Base’s shower floor with his little talons. Tucker’s lathering up that minty body wash she likes-

with _everything on display. Right_ _in front of her son._

Tucker just _shrugs_ , like it’s totally normal, “You wanna babysit him every time I need to wash off?”

“Tucker _why_ -by the way there’s no way he’s not gonna need therapy because of this-”

Tucker looks sidelong at the alien rolling around on the floor trying to eat it’s own foot.

“-Why the fuck do you need a shower? It’s still _noon_.”

Tucker rolls her eyes and shifts to face him so that he can see her left shoulder, then points at… what is-

Bite marks.

Four jawed little needle-toothed _bite marks_ _weep_ blood down her shoulder. Church stares as the red trails down her shoulder mixing with the foam from her body wash turning pink onto the bathroom floor-

Then immediately turns to _It_.

 _It_ takes a minute for it to notice him, then rolls upright and looks up at him curiously.

Like he’s trying to figure out if Church’s food.

Church’s head whips back up to Tucker, “Did _It_ do that to you?”

Tucker’s parasite screws up his four little jaws. That little fucker-it’s making a _face_ at him. Tucker just _shrugs_ again and it’s getting real damned hard not to scream.

“Tucker _Jesus Christ,_ you need to let me shoot that thing.”

The little monster _honks_ at him.

Like it doesn’t know that’s the _last thing_ it’ll ever do.

Tucker glares at him, “ _Dude_ , you can’t make jokes like that anymore. I think he understands you!”

 _“_ Who the fuck’s joking!?! That thing’s a fucking horror movie in progress!”

Tucker scowls at him, “Oh like you’re not dating the terminator?”

_“Blargh!”_

Church whirls on the alien, “Stay out of this you little shi-”

Tucker crosses her arms at him stepping in front of It, “Don’t be a bitch to Junior!”

_“Jun- You fucking named it?!”_

Well, that’s just great, she _named_ it. Now they’re all fucked.

The little monster’s making _that face_ at him again from behind Tucker’s leg. It pulls itself up into a _very_ wobbly stance using Tucker’s leg, then tries and fails a few times to cross his arms.

Church looks down at _It_ unimpressed, “Kid, I’ve met the adult version of you, give it another decade or two, then maybe then I’ll give a shit.”

It _growls_ at him _._

So obviously Church growls back.

Tucker rolls her eyes, “Oh my _god_ you are such a-get out _for real now_ I’ve got parenting to do over here.”

“What!? I’m not-Gah! _Tucker! I’ll rust!!!”_

A while back Tucker somehow got one of those fancy shower heads that you can twist around and change the pulse settings.

She’s shooting him with the angriest one.

“FUCK! FUCK! FINE! I’M GOING!”

_“Blargh!”_

_“Shut up_ _lizard!”_

“HIS NAME IS JUNIOR!”

* * *

After that Church is _done_.

Tucker doesn’t want him to save her from the bloodsucker? Fine. Saves him the rabies. He’s done. _Done._ He’s so freaking done that when he wakes up the next morning to Doc baby proofing their base Church takes one look, grabs his sniper rifle and just leaves.

Fuck it, he’s out.

He just can’t take it anymore, eventually the _joys_ of motherhood will wear Tucker down and after a while he can just convince her to drop the little bloodsucker off in a basket at a fire station.

Then the fire fighters can kill it.

So for now he’s camping out on that cliff that they use to spy on the red team. He doesn’t need to eat, doesn’t get cold, and the red team’s always up to something fucking stupid so he never gets bored. It’s actually the perfect set up.

He’s never had so much consistent quiet, Not since he got stuck with these losers.

…it’s great.

...

…peaceful even.

…

…Tucker’ll get over this eventually.

…

…fuck.

* * *

Church sighs as he absently watches as Sarge tries and fails to start a fire on Grif as he’s napping. They’ve even got a small pile of twigs and grass scattered across his stomach. Simmons keeps _pleading_ with Sarge to use his matches…

Big whoop they’ve been at this crap all day. How long’s he been out here now?

…

He can actually hear himself think.

…

Whenever he’s alone he always get that _nagging_ feeling everyone gets. Like he’s… supposed to _be_ somewhere, or like…he’s supposed to be doing _something_ about _someone…_

_…_

Whatever it is, it’s probably about Tex. It’s always about Tex somehow.

…

Y’know if Tex was here, she wouldn’t put up with this shit. but she’s gone off on a wild freelancer hunt so as fucking usual he’s on his own.

…

Stupid fucking coma.

…

…It’s weird not having Tucker around for thinking about this crap.

She never _helps_ she’s not a fucking therapist or anything…but at least she’s there to call his life a bad military soap opera and then he gets to tell someone to fuck off.

Church gets up with a groan and decides red base isn’t gonna get any more interesting today. May as well check in to see if Tucker’s done with her “Mama” phase yet.

* * *

“Blargh!”

Fuck him, It’s right in the door.

And It’s making that _face_ again, like he just ate a lemon whole.

“Kid. This is _my_ base, get out of my way.”

Junior points a single talon up straight at his face,

“Honk!”

“Hold still I’m shooting you.”

It blows a raspberry at him and Church is already lining up the shot. Church has to be _careful_ to get it in one-

Where the fuck did it go?

Church lowers the rifle to figure out where the fuck it went. One second he had the cleanest shot of his life then suddenly it’s gone-

He suddenly realizes the barrel of the gun’s gotten heavier.

Church looks down and sees _It’s_ chomped onto barrel of his sniper rifle, It’s dangling at least a couple feet from the ground. Church just stares at it for a while as the little demon shows no signs of letting go.

Church swings the rifle back and forth like a sword hoping It’ll just fly off.

* * *

It doesn’t.

So he takes the little monster inside, with the barrel extended _far_ away from himself,

“You brought this on yourself you little demon.”

It makes these angry little hissing noises when he sees Church is taking them inside. He doesn’t try to let go but now he’s flailing his little arms trying to scratch at him.

“Kid if you think I give a flying fu-”

“Doc, Tucker does not look better.”

Caboose?

“Hmm… that’s so weird, her humours are in perfect balance and the healing crystals don’t seem to be doing anything…”

“Tucker is going to die.”

Church and Junior go completely still.

Church drops the sniper rifle without a thought and makes a bee-line for the voices. Junior tumbles to the ground behind him with a tiny cry of outrage.

Church doesn’t actually breathe anymore, and honestly? Doesn’t miss it. Sometimes though, when he’s surprised, it takes the machine a few seconds to catch up with what’s happening around him,

And then it’s almost like he can’t breathe again.

They have Tucker wrapped up in the emergency blanket in her bunk. Doc’s pacing, Caboose’s fidgeting, and Tucker…Tucker doesn’t look so good.

Church can hear her breathing from the entrance to the barracks, heavy and pained like she’s running a marathon but still flat on her ass. Her face is pained and her skin has this clammy grey hue that he’s never seen before. Doc and Caboose are standing a few feet away from her, Doc’s got a hand cupped by his mouth like that’ll keep Tucker from hearing or something.

“Now now Caboose,” Doc says politely with a clipped edge to his tone, “There’s no need to say something like that.”

“Is Tucker going to get better?”

“Maybe not!” Doc replies with a forced pleasantness, “But a negative attitude never helped anything!”

They finally notice him, and from the looks on their faces they know exactly how pissed he is he was left out of the loop. 

“What happened?” Church storms up to them reminding himself quietly that Doc’s the closest thing they have to medical care.

Doc jumps in surprise, “Church!? Where’ve you been?!”

“Hi Church!” Caboose perks up immediately seeing him, like all their problems just disappeared because Church made his entrance.

“Shut up Caboose.”

There’s a brief pause where Caboose should talk, and when he doesn’t Church starts up again, “How-”

“Ok Church!”

Church does a quick count to ten and tries again,

 _“Doc,_ what the hell happened to Tucker?”

Doc looks around the room like he wrote it down or something, “She’s sick! With…something.” When Church takes a step forward Doc talks faster, “Women who’ve recently given birth tend to have weaker immune systems! It could be all _sorts_ of things.”

“Why not use your stupid scanner tool?”

“Church… I have a confession. It glows green, but that’s all it does. For all I know she’s pregnant again.”

Church shoves Doc out of the way to get a closer look a Tucker. he’s pretty sure this is the first time he’s seen her with her hair down. Tucker’s dreads are spilling over her shoulders tangled in a way she usually never allows.

Fuck he’s _never_ seen her this bad, and he’s including the time she got hit by red team’s warthog.

An alien squawk comes from behind him snapping him out of his thoughts. Caboose and Doc both jump like it’s a red alert.

…Junior.

Oh fuck. They didn’t tell him.

Junior stands himself up using the doorway and toddles towards Tucker stubbornly.

Doc immediately pushes himself between Junior and Tucker. Doc has his hands out like he’s blocking a goal and lowers himself to Junior’s level, “Junior! Junior buddy, I thought you were being on guard duty at the door!” Doc looks over to Church and a wave of understanding seems to crash into him, “Ohh…” Doc nods, “Right.”

Junior tries to ignore Doc and crawl past him but Doc’s faster than he looks, quickly snatching Junior straight off the ground and tucks him against his chest oh _so_ carefully.

Junior’s not having _any_ of it, he kicks, and scratches and _howls_ at Doc while trying to crawl over his shoulder to get free. Church watches awkwardly as Doc tries to forcibly console Junior, rocking him back and forth, telling him everything’s ok.

Church looks to Tucker, all the outrage he felt a minute ago taking a sharp plunge into ice water as he notices her neck.

“Honk!”

The little monster bites down on Doc’s armoured hand, Doc _wails_ out in pain dropping Junior to the floor. Without missing a beat Junior scrambles over to Tucker’s bedside and climbs his way up to Tucker in her bunk. With all his tiny might he shakes Tucker by the shoulder to wake her.

_“Blargh!”_

The next minute stretches out for hours. Church is subjected to the saddest most desperate alien sounds he’s ever heard. Caboose and Doc both look to him with identical desperate expressions. Like he knows how to handle this. What’s he supposed to do? Doc already tried the sappy stuff, it didn’t work.

When Tucker starts to stir he can feel the phantom sensation of not breathing end. Wildly reminding him of waiting out a buffering screen. She’s slow about it, and Church doesn’t miss the effort it’s taking her just to adjust herself to look at her new bunkmate.

Junior buries his nose into her cheek like it’s a kiss.

“ _Blargh._ ” Junior mewls out far more gently… and the look on Tucker’s _face._

Church’s never seen her look at anyone so…sweetly.

“Hey baby.” Tucker’s voice is gravelly hoarse but also soft and tingles with faint hysteric giggles. Her face is pale but her cheeks somehow flushed with a fever. She strains her neck to bump her nose against Junior’s forehead, “Mama’s gonna be ok baby.” Tucker smiles at him like she’s got it all figured out when Church knows for a fact she doesn’t, “Promise.”

Church feels a phantom breathe run through him, Without a word Church grabs Doc, his eyes don’t leave Junior and Tucker even as he struggles. Church yanks him by the arm, dragging him out of the room,

“Hey! What the-Church! My patient needs me!”

* * *

“What the fuck do you mean we’re out of plasma!?”

“We used it all on Caboose! He was dying!”

“So do a blood transfusion!”  
  
“We can’t! Caboose’s blood is still dangerously low, I’m not a compatible blood type and _you’re_ a robot!”

“So get some from the Reds! One of them’s gotta be a match!”

“Really? You think they’d do that for her?”

“I dunno, what would you do with a gun to your head?”

“…I already checked their files, none of them are a match.”

Church swears at the top of his lungs and throws his hands up looking at the ceiling. Then fixates on Doc, “We’re a military base! How can we be out of blood!?”

“ _You’re_ team leader Church! Requisition forms are _your_ job! You tell me!”

Doc jumps back with an unmanly yelp as Church whips out his sniper rifle.

 _“Listen up you useless hippie._ My crazy ex isn’t here, so by default, I’m the scariest motherfucker in this base.” Church cocks his gun for effect, “Now, are you gonna fix her or not?”

“Uhh…yes! Yes! I’ll fix her I just…uhm…” Doc’s gaze which has been fixed onto the barrel of Church’s gun since he pulled it out suddenly snaps up in realization.

“Simmons’ herb garden!”

“…What?”

“Oh my gosh! It worked Church! Thinking my life was in danger made me come up with a new idea! I don’t know why I didn’t think of it before!”

“Alright I clearly started off this conversation with far too much credit. What are you saying?”

“We need soybeans! Stat!”

“…No seriously what?”

* * *

_“Put the soybeans in the bag!”_

Simmons backs up but it’s too late, Church is already sticking his gun underneath Simmons’ chin,

“What!? What the hell!?! What’re you doing!?”

Church slaps Simmons’ gun out of his hands and thrusts Doc’s extra hemp bag into his now open hands,

“ _Put. The. Soybeans. In. The. Bag!”_

And it oh _so_ slowly it dawns on Simmons that he’s a step away from his pitiful pet project.

“I…are you robbing me? Are you robbing my herb garden?”

“Well, I’ve got a gun at your head, so yeah, this is a robbery!”

Simmons immediately turns to Grif and points triumphantly, “Ha! See, I told you my herb garden was awesome!”

Church had Caboose take Grif on, but since Caboose’s gun is just filled with his emergency crayons now, and Grif apparently didn’t have any ammo on him either, Caboose just jumped on top of him. It didn’t even look like Grif fought him for it either. Caboose’s just _sitting_ on him,

“What the fuck do they know?! They’re blues!”

“Church…I will be honest. I do not want to eat my vegetables.”

Church sighs tragically at the thought of explaining this to Caboose _again,_

“ _Caboose_ _please_ for the last time, they’re _not_ _for you_ -Goddamit why doesn’t anyone _listen_ -” Church mentally counts to five and says simply, “Doc? Go get what you need.”

Doc hustles past them to the garden taking as many soybeans as he can stuff into the bag. Only when he sees his garden being robbed does Simmons really start to protest, “Hey! Heeey! I worked hard on that! C’mon you guys don’t be dicks!”

Church lets the phantom sensation of rolling his eyes come and go, “Simmons, are you kidding? Of course we’re dicks.”

Doc perks his head up from the garden merrily, “Church! They have garlic too! That’ll be perfect for the infection!”

Simmons quizzically turns his head to Church, “Infection?”

Church sends off a warning shot into the ground making Simmons jump, “Ahck! Dude what the fu-”

“Goddamit! Stop asking questions and put the garlic in the bag!” Simmons gives a last perplexed look at Church but starts harvesting. Grif looks over from on the ground and asks,

“So, don’t get me wrong, I’m not complaining about the robbery or anything. I mean, not only do I get to lie down and not have to do anything, but you’re also taking away the vegetables? It’s a win win for me. But I gotta ask, what’re you guys gonna do about the rest of red team?”

Simmons speaks up bravely from gardening, “You’ll never get the better of Sarge!” Church shrugs unworried,

“Relax, I “accidentally” broadcasted a diabolical plot on the open line to hide a secret death ray in the caves to use on you guys later. He’ll be all night trying to find it.”

Simmons pauses and then sighs disappointedly, “Well, Sarge does love death rays…There’s still Lopez though!”

Church eyes him and then look past Simmons to Lopez as he casually leans against the outside wall of Red team’s base, “Yo Lopez!? Feeling heroic?”

Simmons’s head swings around like he’s only just noticing Lopez, “Lopez?! How long have you been there!?

Lopez stares blankly at Simmons, “Estas bromeando? He estado aquí todo el tiempo.”

Simmons practically screeches, “This is no time to brag about your _stealth skills_ Lopez! Quick! Do something!”

There’s an uncomfortable pause in the air before Lopez responds looking directly at Church, “No veo nada.”

Then he just walks off.

As Simmons gawks Grif nods approvingly from the ground, “I’d’ve done the same thing if I didn’t already have this _sweet_ hostage job…and it didn’t require _walking._ ”

Simmons tosses his head up and tries weakly, “…Donut?”

Grif gives him a pitying look, “Really Simmons?”

“I don’t fucking know! We’re low on options!”

Doc’s taken over all of the gathering at this stage which is the only reason Church’s stopped yelling, but he’s poked his head up for this part, “Oh, no! Sorry! I didn’t want him wrapped up in all this so I asked him to meet me in the caves.”

Church’s head swings to Doc, “You did what?”

Doc nods earnestly as he stands with the bag of vegetables, “Yeah, I mean, he’s a nice guy, and I’d just…I’d never forgive myself if an idea of mine got him hurt-”

Simmons throws his hands up in a “what the hell” gesture, but chooses to remain silent.

“So I told him to meet me in the caves.”

There’s a pause until Grif’s finally the one to ask, “To do what?”

“What?”

“To do what?”

“Well we’re not _actually_ meeting there.”

“No I know that, what’d you tell him you two were going to do?”

“Meet in the cave. Obviously.”

“No. _what_ were you gonna _do_ in the cave?”

“Meet! We were gonna _meet_ in the cave Grif!”

Simmons hisses from the garden impatiently,

“Dude, shut up! What are you doing?”

“Extending break time Simmons, what do you _think_ I’m doing?”

Church feels himself hitting his bullshit limit so he turns to Doc fixating on a particular point.

“The _cave?_ ” Church’s question causes Simmons to shriek indignantly,

“Don’t encourage them!”

“No, _no_. See if you got _Donut_ to go to the caves and I got _Sarge_ to go to the caves then-”

“Freeze dirtbag!”

A shot gun cocks behind Church and he swears under his breathe. Simmons lets out a victorious “whoop”. Grif’s head clunks back to the ground sighing,

“God dammit.”

“Well well well!” Sarge starts clearly gearing up for a big speech, “Just as I suspected! You nefarious blues were trying to pull one over on old Sarge eh? Well too bad! Nothing gets past the red team!”

Doc quietly looks around awkwardly, then slowly turns behind him to see Donut right behind him with his hands on his hips bristling with rage,

“You stood me up for Simmons!?”

Simmons gets up dusting himself off and squawks indignantly, “Don’t say it like that, I was getting mugged!”

Doc flips around hands thrown up trying to defuse the situation, “Donut,” Doc starts in a calming tone, “I can explain.”

All parties twist their heads back to Doc as he speaks but then flip back to Donut as he yells,

“Explain?” Donut starts incredulous and dramatic, “I cant’ wait to hear this explanation mister! I mean, to be stood up for Simmons is one thing-”

“Hey!”

“But being stood up for _gardening_ with Simmons instead of _meeting me_ in the caves?!”

Simmons throws down a handful of garlic, and crosses his arms pouting.

Grif throws his hands up, “What the fuck were you two gonna do in that cave?!”

Simmons turns, “Why would you ask _Donut_ that?”

“Fuck! Fuck! Fuck! I take it back I take it back!”

Sarge hollers from behind Church, “Donut! Enough! Sort out your affairs later! This is _war_ son! What you do with civilians is on your time! Not on your commanding officers’!”

Doc turns to Sarge offended, “I am _not_ a civilian!”

“Not a civie you say?” Sarge scoffs, “Where’s your gun then!?” Doc sighs,

“We’ve been over this, I’m a conscientious observer!”

“And not on either team.” Simmons points out,

“And also you _don’t have a gun.”_ Grif reasserts.

Even Caboose speaks up, “And you have that guy in your head that keeps telling you to betray us... So even if you were in the army well… maybe you’re not anymore. I dunno, when was the last time you reported to a superior?”

A moment is taken to absorb that Caboose just made the strongest argument.

Donut harrumphes loudly and crosses his arms pointedly looking away from Doc, Doc looks at his feet ashamed only risking the quickest glances to look at Donut.

Jesus Fuck there are so many different things going on right now these people need to form a fucking _line-_

Oh _fuck-_

“Junior _don’t!”_

Too fast for Church to stop him Junior jumps out of no where and chomps onto Sarge’s trigger hand. Sarge swears in a way that not even Church would in front of the kid. Sarge swings the alien wildly in the air-

Then shoots off his gun.

Junior drops with a yelp.

_“JUNIOR!”_

Caboose roars Junior’s name, leaping off of Grif and tackles Sarge to the ground. Doc lets out scream of horror, and with a death grip on his bag storms through Simmons’ garden.

Church gets there far before him.

Junior’s whimpering curled up into a little ball hiding his stomach, his breathing is wheezy.

“Fuck! Fuck no! Fuck! You are _not_ fucking haunting me! That is _my_ job, you’re not getting that too!” Church yells hysterically at Junior carefully turning him over to try and see the bullet wound. He didn’t see an exit wound so he’s gotta fucking get the bullet out-or fuck, if it’s nicked a vein- 

Church forces his tiny arms away from his stomach and sees there’s no wound.

As Caboose singlehandedly charges into each member of the Red base like a deranged bull Doc rushes over to Junior _who’s still making those pitiful whimpering noises._

“Is he ok?” Doc start kneeling down next to them, “What happened? Is it a head shot!? It’s ok CPR _will_ work it’s been proven!”

Church was dealing with a lot of phantom adrenaline a few seconds ago, and honestly the dump of it all isn’t really putting him in a more reasonable mood than he’s been for the last few days.

So he’s gonna scream.

“Why the fuck were you acting like you just got shot?!”

He makes sure to look the little bastard directly in the eyes as he says it. Junior just makes that fucking _face_ at him again.

Doc inspects Junior’s stomach and Junior watches them both with watery eyes. Whatever, Church will _never_ fall for that again. Doc then looks to the ground Junior landed on and sees a rounded stone not much bigger than a lime, “Ohhh! I get it. See Junior landed flat on his stomach over this little stone here…”

Caboose throws Grif, his ragged screams echo throughout the canyon.

“Then he probably got the wind knocked out of him.” Doc puts his hand to his heart sympathetically and tilts his head in a way that would probably make Church vomit if he was alive, then pats his head gently as Junior nuzzles into his hand, “Poor thing, that must’ve hurt-”

Church thrusts Junior into Doc’s arms and stands up enraged,

“Caboose! We’re leaving!” Caboose stops dead in the middle of menacingly holding Simmons’s over his head about to throw him at Sarge and Grif. Grif and Sarge holding each other out of pure terror. Caboose turns rigidly, spots Junior kicking his little feet, suddenly all the righteous fury turns to childish joy.

“Ok Church!”

Junior drops Simmons without a care and calmly walks over to the garden to grab their bags. Sarge and Grif watch Caboose the entire time stiff as a board together. Church decides to make a run for it while red team’s still scared shitless and signals for them to start running.

As Sarge and Grif realize they’ve been hugging for half a minute they snap away from each other in a mix of disgust and horror. Simmons manages to flip himself from the ground onto his back and sees an upside down view of them running away,

_“What the fuck!?”_

* * *

The only reason Church let Junior hang back with Tucker is because he thought he knew where all the reds were.

So when the little bastard latched himself onto Caboose’s back and Caboose didn’t think to mention that, he’s got not problem admitting that’s he furious, but at this point not as surprised as he should be.

Caboose runs while guiltily tapping his index fingers together, “So…when we were leaving…the baby could tell what we were doing…he knew we were gonna go get what we needed to save Tucker…and I could tell, he wanted to come with us.”

Church scoffs at him, “Caboose you don’t know what the fuck he’s saying.”

Caboose’s face reminds him of a guilty eight year old that’d been caught smoking, “He wanted to help…” Caboose starts sounding absolutely miserable, “But he was too tiny, he’d never make it the entire way.” Church scowls at Caboose’s complete mood shift into a chipper tone, “So I helped him!”

Church groans feeling a phantom headache wedge itself between his optics,“How did he even get to Sarge’s gun if he was hiding behind you?”

Caboose eagerly explains, “He wiggled off! And then he hid behind you so you couldn’t see him. You do not pay enough attention to what’s behind you.” Caboose admonishes, “That is why Sarge could sneak up on you like that.”

…There’s nothing worse in this world than when Caboose is right about something. He can never know. 

“And that’s how he got there in time to save the day!”

 _Save the day_ is a little much,

It takes Church a second too long to realize that Caboose stopped running. Church skids to a stop a few seconds after and notices how far behind them both Doc is. He turns back to Caboose hanging his head and recounts quietly, “And then he almost got shot…”

…

“He is just a little baby Church.”

Church…really doesn’t like where this is going so he tries to snuff this out early,

“Alright, let’s just get this straight.” Church starts closing the gap between the two of them, “It’s not a baby, it’s a bloodsucking tic that Tucker got infected with _by an alien that tried to kill us_. It is _not_ a baby.”

Caboose sniffles quietly, but doesn’t look convinced, so Church has to keep trying, “She didn’t even actually get pregnant!” Caboose pouts and says,

“But it came out of her.”

“…Yeah.”

Caboose’s helmet tilts questioningly, “And that is what the book says happen when you have a baby.”

Church crosses his arms and a scowl crosses his mind’s eye, “Yeah, that happens with parasites too.”

“…But Tucker loves him.”

Church needs a few seconds to squash down the sudden wave of consternation that cuts straight through him. It takes a couple minutes to response after that, “Yeah… well… Tucker’s stupid. You say so all the time.”

“Yeah…Tucker’s really stupid…” Caboose nods scuffing his foot along the dirt, “But even really smart people can love people they shouldn’t.”

Church pushes down the traitorous mental image of Tex as soon as it flares up.

Doc finally catches up to them, still carrying Junior. He wheezing and out of breathe and at the first chance rests his hands against his knees crouching in exhaustion,

“Where’d you guys learn to run so fast?”

* * *

Tucker isn’t any worse off than she was before they left but that’s that’s still a half step from death’s door.

The first thing Doc does when they’re back is to tuck Junior into bed with Tucker. He drags Caboose behind him into their kitchen saying he’s going to make Caboose his assistant.

“This shouldn’t take long! Watch them!” 

Church looks down at the two of them, and he does watch them. Church watches them as they curl into each other so softly and effortlessly It looks…

Natural.

* * *

Church eyes Doc skeptically, “That’s it? You’re just boiling it?”

Doc nods eagerly as he helps Tucker drink from his thermos, “Yeah! Soybean and Garlic soup! Soy beans are filled to the brim with iron! That’s what helps your body replace blood, and garlic’s a natural antibiotic! People have used it for centuries to get over infections. By boiling it in water the broth will suck up all the nutrients. This way if the nausea gets too bad she doesn’t even need to chew!”

Church looks at him skeptically, “…That almost sounds smart _.”_

Doc seems too pleased with himself to be offended. Tucker covers her mouth from a cough, Caboose is helping her sit up so he’s on the bed with her. Her voice is weak but layered with effort, “Guys,” Tucker starts hoarsely, “If I had to eat this crap and it _doesn’t_ make me better, There’ll be hell to pay.”

Church tells her to shut up and swallow.

Relief collapses inside him when he hears the “Bow Chika Bow Wow”.

* * *

Tucker responds to the medicine the way a drowning victim responds to air. For the first couple of days. Then she bitches constantly about how the soup taste like crap.

She’s not wrong, but after everything they went through to get them, she’s clearing out the bag.

Junior hasn’t left her side since Doc put him into bed with her.

Church’s been keeping an eye on them when he has free time, and since the reds are still recovering from Caboose’s rampage, that’s added up to a pretty big chunk of his time.

Tucker’s still a little feverish, and needs a lot of sleep, so she drifts in and out, but when she’s awake, Junior gets _all_ her attention. The little jerk _lives_ for it.The second he sees her stir, he scrambles up from his usual space lying against her hip and crawls right up into her face. It’s always cooing these little alien sounds demanding she wake up and love him.

And every time, no matter how many times Church tries to deny it, he can’t un-see how Tucker always wakes up with a smile. 

* * *

It’s a few days later and Tucker’s still in rough shape, but she’s not dying anymore.

Her face still isn’t it’s usual deep brown, and her voice is still low and hoarse, but at least she’s sitting up on her own. Even the bite marks that dig into her shoulders have soothed back into a healthier shade.

“Doc,” Tucker pushes away Doc’s insistent spoonful of soup, “Listen, I appreciate this and all, but if you shove anymore of that piss in my face today I’m gonna have my baby eat you.”

Junior starts growling on cue and Doc takes a nervous step back.

“Well uh… we can take a break for now!” Doc chirps as non aggressively as he can, “No problem! I need to get tomorrow’s medicine ready anyways.”

Tucker falls back to the bed with a groan and Junior immediately crawls up from her stomach to check on her.

When Tucker notices his worried face she rubs his head and tells him softly but in a distinctly _Mom_ tone that Church cringes at,

“Don’t look at me like that.” 

Junior tucks his head down abashed.

* * *

Somehow it gets worse when Tucker gets better.

“C’mon baby.” Tucker pleads softly pushing Junior’s face into her un-bitten shoulder. She rubs the back of his neck gently as she asks again, “Please?”

Junior whimpers pressing his nose against her shoulder and closing his eyes.

The little bastard hasn’t eaten in almost a week.

Doc’s been mashing up some MRE’s, y’know, get him onto solids so Blue team doesn’t keep dying. He keeps puking it up though. Tucker keeps trying to share her soup when Doc isn’t looking but Junior refuses to drink. So now she’s resorted to begging.

Church hits his limit when he hears Junior crying.

Church marches over to them before he can talk himself out of it. Tucker’s not gonna want to talk to him, he’s been avoiding them, but he’s also been hovering, and he’s sure Tucker’s been pissed off by both. Tucker glowers at him the second he gets near them,

“Before you say it, shut up.” Tucker turns to her alien all tucked into her shoulder and uses a voice that means she’s trying to lay down the law, “ _Junior_ is going to eat today. Isn’t that right little man?”

Junior whimpers quietly refusing to move.

Fuck this. He’ll hate Junior, He’ll save Junior, he’ll probably fight Junior to the death someday, but Church will _not_ pity this little bastard. Church grabs Junior out of Tucker’s arms before Tucker realizes what he’s pulling,

“Hey-what-” Tucker tries to grab him back but she’s too pensive trying to grab Junior without hurting him, “Give him back!” Tucker demands. Church doesn’t say a word and then Tucker looks directly to Junior with a happy face and opens up her arms expectantly, “Junior baby,” Tucker coos cheerfully, “Come back to Mama baby, it’s okay!”

Junior looks to Tucker with mist filled eyes and shocks Church and Tucker both by curling into Church’s arms turning away from her.

Tucker looks at him like he slapped her, and to Church’s horror seems like she’s about to cry. So Church yells out at the top of his lungs,

“Doc! Get in here! Now!”

Doc rushes in with a thermos and is at her bedside within ten seconds.

“What! What!? Is it the baby? Tucker? What?”

Church down at the hungry bundle in his arms and says one word,

“Eat.”

Junior launches himself at Doc, and chomps down into Doc’s neck and Doc screams bloody murder dropping to the floor from shock. Church watches Doc writhing on the floor screaming desperately for Junior to stop.

Church’ll admit, he feels a little bad about this one. For once Doc’s been nothing but helpful, but he didn’t have another walking blood bag around. Plus there was no way he was gonna fucking listen to all of _that_ for the rest of the day.

Church notices Tucker in the corner of his eye, she still looks like she’s about to cry. But he can tell now it’s out of relief. He looks at her and it’s like all the exhaustion and suffering she’s gone through the past week just melts away because she sees her son’s gonna be ok. Motherhood really did a number on her.

…

She’s never going back to normal is she?

 _This_ is Tucker now.

In a moment of defeat Church admits slowly, “I…shouldn’t have offered to kill the little shit.”

Tucker stares a second longer at her son eating for the first time in days then turns to Church impassively, “Yeah,” She agrees, “That was pretty fucked up.”

Church gestures dryly to Doc as he screams like a banshee begging for his life,

“This is all pretty fucked up.”

Tucker lets out the first laugh he’s heard from her in weeks and Church pretends he didn’t notice her wiping away the tears from her eyes,

“Yeah,” Tucker admits, “He’s eating a guy Church. I have eyes.”

Church shrugs not letting any of the importance of this moment show, “Well… this is blue team, fucked up is what we do best.”

Tucker giggles in a way that immediately makes Church feel better.

Doc’s screams have died out. Now he’s just quietly watching in horror as Junior greedily licks up the blood spilling from his neck. He’s pretty sure he commed Caboose because after a minute Caboose tumbles in carrying the medkit.

Church looks at Tucker, relieved and heartbroken and terrified all at once somehow and makes a decision,

“We’ll just start feeding him red team until he gets on solid food.”

Tucker looks at him with that new misty eyed look and Church needs that shut down, _now._

 _“_ What?...What the hell? Tucker, _stop that.”_

She smiles with that touched look he can’t get used to, “ You called him _him_ Church.”

Church freezes. When the hell did he start doing that?

Tucker’s smile slowly turns into a toothy grin as she pokes him in the side, “You _liiike_ him. My son totally grew on you when you weren’t looking.”

Church snaps at her trying to shut this down before it becomes a thing, “Fuck you. I hate everyone.”

Tucker just smiles the shit eating grin without saying a word.

Church fumes, “I _do_.”

Tucker crosses her arms triumphantly and Church jabs a finger at her in warning,

_“Stop that.”_

Tucker just keeps smiling like she’s won forever and he’s about to scream and then-

“Blargh!”

Junior reaches up for Tucker from on top of Doc’s twitching body. His jaws are dripping with blood, but Church can immediately tell the difference. Junior went from uncomfortably skinny to having a little tummy, and he’s gone from barely awake to “ _look at me mom!”_. In a really fucked up way he reminds Church of a little kid showing his mom he ate all his vegetables for the first time.

Tucker puts a hand over her chest giving Junior this lovestruck look and runs over to pick him up in her arms. Junior’s so happy he’s bouncing on Doc’s chest as Tucker scoops him up with a spin,

“There’s Mama’s good boy!” Tucker cheers to him swinging Junior in her arms like she doesn’t have a care in the world, “Was he tasty?”

Church can hear the happy honk as Tucker takes him away, and the hiss of the biofoam being opened to be smeared across Doc’s neck.

“Yeah, it’s because he eats all that healthy crap. You can eat Grif next time. Trust me, that blood’s practically maple syrup.”

As Church hears Junior gleeful squeal he lets himself relax into his chair for a minute before he goes to deal with O’Malley declaring vengeance against them all.

...

Still better than the cliff.

**Author's Note:**

> Belatedly, Happy Holidays! Here’s your late holiday gift!


End file.
